Two things...

 Grief

Two separate thoughts from two different people that just really hit home and settled in the last few weeks.

Allowing for and acknowledging the grief of the child that did not happen.

Sometimes grief is manifested in a frenetic need to help others.

Finished in 2022

Finished in 2022*

Books - Check 'em Out

Jan 1st: Network Effect (The Murderbot Diaries #5) by Martha Wells

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ Full-length Murderbot novel.  ART pulls Murderbot into an adventure involving alien tech. Hilarity** and mayhem ensue. Book#5 in series; Nothing ground shattering here but really enjoyable, like sitting down to watch a favorite television series; comfort entertainment. [ebook]

Jan 7th: Fugitive Telemetry (The Murderbot Diaries #6) by Martha Wells 

⋆ ⋆ ⋆This is a murder mystery/detective story with Murderbot as the curmudgeonly detective who just can't get along with the local police. Book#6 in series. Having just finished #5 the week before, it really threw me off  trying to figure out the where this story fit in the timeline... why it is marked as #6 in the series but makes no reference to the events in #5. Instead it seems like, possibly, a short story of events happening before the story in book #5- a forward or footnote of explanation would have been much appreciated. Murderbot had made some seemingly huge realizations in Network Effect and was on the cusp of heading off in a new direction and so I eagerly started Fugitive Telemetry to see what they would be doing next and then...huh, did Murderbot go back to doing what the job with Mensah like nothing happened or is this actually something that happened before Network Effect?? This confusion really took away from my enjoyment, so that in the end the story felt just kinda meh. [ebook]

Jan 13th:  Cibola Burn  (The Expanse #4) by James S.A. Corey

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆This book is my sci-fi jam - space cowboys/pioneers, exploration of new worlds/alien tech while trying to problem solve with limited resources. And in the end...Everything works out more or less ok for the main characters. This is the 4th in the Expanse series and I am hoping that the other crew members will get some more fleshed out stories soon. Spoilers - To me, it feels like Naomi and Alex spend a lot of  time in these books on the ship, away from the main action happening while Amos and Holden are fighting the "bad guys" or whatever. Naomi, often seems to mainly be relegated to solving some technical problem so that her and Alex can swoop in with the Roci and save Amos & Holden. When Naomi was captured, my first thoughts were annoyance. Like seriously, she is just going to be sitting in a jail cell instead of doing anything??? Her capture did basically allow her to turn the security officer to her side but seriously, it would be nice for her to be something other than someone else's conscience. [ebook]

Yarn Over

One crocheted hat using an improvised pattern of crocheting a flat circle until it was about the size of the top of my head and then decreasing a few rows, then crocheting around until it seemed long enough to fit on a head, then decreasing a few more rows until I stopped. Made with Lion Brand Homespun Bulky Acrylic Polyester Blend Gray Yarn*** and probably a J size hook****

The hat that apparently was 99% done probably back at the beginning of 2021. I just hadn't been sure about if it needed a brim***** and if so, how to exactly do that in crochet & so had stuck it in a bag with a bunch of other unfinished yarn projects. Pulled it out in November of 2021, when I was looking for something else, and was startled to realize it basically could be finished if I just secured the last stitch and wove in the ends ::facepalm:: So...I did that, and it was done. To me, the shape was weirdly abrupt where it transitioned from the top to the sides but the finished product looked freakin' adorable on my MIL****** so I'm calling this a win. 🏆

*Ongoing series, hopefully...we'll see...I'm not that good at staying on top of things...

**Hilarity is highly subjective, of course

***probably??? it's been a really long time since I bought this particular yarn and I've started to use it for knitting hat/scarf before but it is weird and difficult to knit. I have no idea its exact details but it's a gray, cream & golden beige blend color. 

****this is exactly why I need to start keeping track of what the heck I am doing

*****that might not be the correct term...the ribbed edge of a beanie type hat...whatever that is called

******To be honest, she is probably the entire reason the hat looked adorable

☆~☆~☆~☆~☆

Book Ratings Guide

1 ⋆ just, no

2 ⋆ ⋆ meh

3 ⋆ ⋆ ⋆  sufficed [as expected, nothing outstanding, but enjoyable for what it is]

4 ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆   very much enjoyed

5 ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ found it overall delightful 

Dancing Backwards

Autism in Heels: The Untold Story of a Female Life on the Spectrum
Author: Jennifer Cook O'Toole

"Mad and scared look a lot a like. So do shy and stuck-up, overwhelmed and impatient."

"Collecting cheerfulness...actively take 5-10 seconds to let the good be seen & noted."

"We don't actually have different brains. We have differently wired equally-human brains. Human functions - like feeling - aren't missing, for crying out loud. They're just different in brains that are neurologically different, regardless of which way the comparison is made."

--*--*--*--*--

This book gave me A LOT to think about and bolstered my desire to understand how human minds work. I would be interested in reading the stories of others on the spectrum, since this book is detailing only the very individual experiences of the author. It doesn't flow like an informational book, instead it tended towards a stream of consciousness style. Not perfect but definitely something worth investigating.

Bullet in the Brain Pan

Title: The Girl Who Played with Fire
Author: Steig Larsson
Narrator: Simon Vance

I do think that the original title of the first book "Men who hate Women" is actually more descriptive of the series.

The book started off slow for me and I kind of only half paid attention - I don't really care all that much about everyone's sex lives and such but once the action started it just kept building.

Onward Gladys

Title: The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie
Author: Alan Bradley
Read by: Jayne Entwistle


A dead body in the cucumber patch! I enjoyed this mystery novel with its eccentric characters and cheeky young protagonist. It had a classic feel that reminded me of Agatha Christie or Nancy Drew stories. I think I would have enjoyed this even more when I was a kid and would definitely recommend it to young friends who might enjoy reading about a clever, persistent 11 year-old budding chemist.

The narrator of the audio book was very good and probably contributed a lot to my enjoyment of the story.

Let's try something

Title:Will Grayson, will grayson
By:  John Green and David Levithan

I listened to this as a downloadable audiobook from the public library and found it due to the FYA blog http://www.foreveryoungadult.com/2010/04/15/they-shouldve-called-this-book-tiny-cooper-tiny-cooper/

I really enjoyed this book and yes, Tiny Cooper is fabulous.
I found that for myself I was much more drawn to & liked/related to Will Grayson [written by David Levithan i believe, whose Nick from Nick & Norah I also enjoyed] much more than will grayson. will grayson's negativity - while i could understand how he got there - was a bit grating to me and i found I was eager to get back to Will Grayson's POV during those sections.
Likely because I've become a parent, I just was moved to tears by how awesome both boys parents were and how supportive and understanding they could be. I hope someday to be that great.

Secret to Contentment #3

"Maintain an Appreciative Attitude - Why not make a mental or written list of the things for which you are grateful?"

Sounds so simple but why are all the problems, petty or otherwise, the ones we dwell on instead?  Instead of being depressed about the fact that I'm not traveling right now, wouldn't it be wiser to be grateful for all the traveling I have been able to do in my past and grateful for the fact that I have a good paying job in this economy and don't have to worry about paying my rent, health costs, my next meal, etc.? HA - silly human your problems are really so small and you have SO MUCH goodness spread out before you. It's like focusing on the rock in your shoe and missing looking out at the Grand Canyon right in front of you.

Bah - now if only I can remember this bit of wisdom!